I'm tired of arguing with my husband. I'm tired of him not listening to me. I'm tired of being blamed for everything.
Take last night as an example. He went out with his friends (again). On Tuesday it was the second time this week. I already fought and lost the whole 'going out an obnoxious number of times' battle, but the scars are still deep within me. I'm sure I twist and over analyze it, but to me it just seems like he'd rather not spend time with me. I mean yesterday he woke up from napping on the chair to go out. He wouldn't wake up to spend time with me.
Anyway, back to this fight. I gave in on acting like a college kid again, but I asked him to compromise with me and try to be back by midnight. That way I can sleep better knowing he is not driving. That way I can sleep better knowing he is home in case something crazy happens here. I give a little and he gives a little. Makes sense, right?
Well apparently not. He says since I'm just asleep then what's the point of him being home. So I don't sleep well most nights. And I guess I get into the wife nagging stage with him. Back to last night.
12:30am I texted him asking when he would be home.
He texted me telling me I should trust him more.
I replied saying I worry about myself and the girls being home alone too.
He texted I should just trust God more.
I told him God gave me a husband to protect me.
Andrew's words: "Fuck you Christy. Ill never hang out with friends again."
I'm done. I give up. I can't fight with him anymore.
This morning my wedding rings felt tighter as I slid them onto my finger. I think we need counseling, but he's so great at twisting it onto me, he has me thinking I'm the one who needs help. I'm the one with all the problems and all his problems come from having to deal with me.
We haven't even been married four years, and I'm tired.
Wow! I'm over for the first time from Shell's PYHO and my heart is breaking for you. You are NOT wrong to want him home and a man should never speak to his wife that way. I will pray for you and your family. I'm sure you are tired and I am so sorry for it.
ReplyDeleteOh, sweetie! I'm so sorry you are going through this. My husband and I had fights like this after our first was born. It took a lot of fights and him deciding he wanted to grow up for him to change.
ReplyDeleteSending you prayers.
This is a tough thing to deal with! We were 'older' when we had our first. We'd already been together ten years, almost all of which we spent going out etc. It made such a difference to how we were as parents. Neither of us misses going out. I hope things turn out well for you!
ReplyDeleteSo, sorry. The fights are the worst. :-(
ReplyDeleteprayers for you sweetie! the beginning of marriage is always the hardest, it takes lots of work on both sides and will not work with just one oar paddling the boat
ReplyDeleteOH wow. First, thank you for your honesty! I hate that you are going through this. I hope things turn out better. That maybe through a good chat you two can hear each other's heart and make some changes to help this work.
ReplyDeleteDon't know if you want to read a book, but this book seriously helped my marraige in so many ways. Take my advice or leave it, I don't mind. "Love and Respect." it is amazing. I think the author is Dr. Emmerichs.
~Annie of AnniesHeart.com